Yesterday was one of those days. There have been a lot of them lately, but it was particularly troubling to me. At the end of the day, I sat there kind of depleted and talking to God. I couldn't sleep so I sat with the Lord and I had peace about the little break I am about to take from the blog.
Mother is good in many ways. I was looking at pictures taken at Tucker's party and she looks good. She is so photographic and no one can see in a short period of time what I see. I see things that I saw with my grandmother, her mother years ago. She can fixate on something and nothing I say can help alleviate her worries or her troubled state. Yesterday was one of those days. If she goes down as much in the next year as she has the last 12 months it won't be a good thing. Aging can be hard people. She has gone back on the idea of going to assisted living. Well again, aging is hard. I am glad she is near me, but it takes a lot of energy to care for her and I am just really at the beginning of the hard.
I read a book, actually I have read a good many lately, but I just haven't felt like blogging about them. The book called Retiring Well, by John Dunlop, MD has been one that has had me thinking in a good way. The author is a retired geriatric doctor and Christian. He writes about his practice and things he has seen people do well in retirement and not so well. One thing that was particularly helpful and put my mind at peace was this big old house. I think there is retirement at more than one stage. There is the retirement that comes in your mid sixties and then there is retirement at an older age as things change in your mind and body. I have wondered if we should downsize, but I think we are in a good place that is home to our kids and a great place for grandkids to come and enjoy the water. I am so blessed to have my kids here and watching the oldest grandson now is quite fun. He owns the house and loves it here. But, I know there comes a time when smaller will matter. The other chapter that really hit me was taking care of your body and mind.
Jeff and I have both been reading it and discussing it since he is planning to try and make it 3 more years. We both see the need to remain physically healthy for ourselves and each other. But mental health is important too. I have a lot to tax me at this point. I did start at the beginning of September to drop the 8ish pounds that I had let creep back up on me. 8ish pounds doesn't sound like much, but they were making a difference. I have one more to lose. It has made a huge difference. I also am committed to my gluten free diet even during all of the Thanksgiving and Christmas. For me it is a BIG DEAL. It would be hard to understand if you don't have the issues I have.
Mother has an appointment with the PA next month and I doubt it will be much more than jut a visit to go over bloodwork which for the most part will come out very well.
Lindsay was due to have surgery on the 15th of next month for the issue gained with the birth of Palmer. She really liked and trusted the doctor and all was set to do it then so that she would have the holiday to recover. She received a call on Monday that the doctor has had some kind of medical emergency and can't do it. They were not even responsive to if he would be back at all. My strong girl cried her little eyes out. WE regrouped and prayed and have found another doctor in Pensacola that is new. I am going with her next week to meet him. I don't know how that will go, but it is a step in forward motion. We can always look to Gainesville if this is not an option with this doctor. It is not a surgery you want just any old doctor to do. And his misfortune whatever it is, is a reminder to savor the good in life.
I am finally getting a little relieve from my sinus infection. I don't know if I will be over it by the end of my month or not, but I have learned that I simply must take care of myself if I am going to be of help to anyone else.
The past few years I have taken January off from blogging and kind of fasted from so much input from social media, video, etc. I love the Internet, but don't you just kind of miss the old days of one magazine a month and not being able to look up and know just everything at once or reading so much to clog up the brain.
After talking with the Lord, I really decided that I needed that break now rather than January. I love November. It begins to look and feel like fall here in north Florida. I have always loved Thanksgiving. I don't like how Christmas comes so early these days. I like my Thanksgiving mindset which I think enhances Christmas.
I am such a type A personality and even with Scripture reading I can make it too complicated trying to be too scholarly. I am finishing up the book of the Bible I have been studying today and plan to use December to focus on old familiar passages that bring me comfort rather than a reading plan that almost stresses me out trying to learn and gleen so much.
Yes, I am taking that fast of blogging. My mind is not going to think, "Oh I need to record this or that," but I am going to unplug and just live the days taking care of me and my family. IT is really all I can think of right now. The things right in front of me that are important.
I am going to use November to regroup, praise Him who has so richly blessed me and prepare my heart for the upcoming season.
WE will be less 2 this year at Thanksgiving. OF course, Danny, but my niece Kristan lost her father in law 2 weeks ago. They have joined us for Thanksgiving ever since she and Torrey married. It was a bit of a shock. I knew he looked poorly last Thanksgiving. He had Covid before then and then just had complications from then on. But, you know what else we have little Miles celebrating his first Thanksgiving. IT is life friends.
I am taking the month off rather than waiting until January and will be back after Thanksgiving. I hope it will be refreshed.
Take care everyone. Hug your loved ones and count your blessings.
See you in a month.
Sandy
